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Letter #127: The Draft

February 4, 2011

Dear draft,

The time has come where I will be part of you for the only time in my life. Unfortunately, nobody’s going to draft me into their organization for millions before I’ve even proved myself or my ability.

I watched the ESPN documentary last night, “Tim Tebow: Everything in Between,” which followed him as he prepared for his version of you. I’d like to state three observations: 1) Tim Tebow is a beast. End of story. 2) I wish there would’ve been more coverage on him as a person…hello, I’m still deciding if he’s marriable?! 3) If I worked out ALL day long, I’d be in impeccable shape as well. Nevertheless, Tebow reached his goal and was taken in the first round of you.

I did some extra research to see just how much he pocketed for this. Even if he never steps on the field, he’s guaranteed eight million dollars and can reach up to 33 million if he plays well. Are you kidding me?! We live in a messed up world. He’s making millions without ever doing anything. At least some of his money is based on performance. Tebow probably gives at least 80% of his salary away, so it’s alright for him, right?! Kidding.

So, why am I talking about Tebow besides my newly developed respect and crush on him after reading this article?! Oh yes, drafts. No, I’m not training for my NFL version of you, nor preparing my bank account to receive millions, nor looking for an agent, but I do get to semi serve as an agent this week!

For four months, I’ve traveled the country looking for the most excited, fun, driven, kid-friendly, Jesus-loving college students to work at Kanakuk Kamps. (Yes, it’s possible to use Jesus-loving and college student in the same sentence even when referencing OU…I know, tough to believe!) Never did I dream I’d travel 12,000+ miles and interview 162 girls (amazingly, I remember every single one…for now at least!), but I did, and it’s time to see the process come to an end.

Kanakuk’s version of you commences today. Before entering, know we pay in $20’s, play injured and have phenomenal fans…we call them kampers!

Today, we begin to put the final touches on summer 2011 staff. I’m humbled to serve as 162 players’ agent, but I’m also saddened my placement percentage will likely be small. My 162 are just a small portion of the thousands entered in you. Good news is all the agents work for the commissioner (God), and he has a far greater package deal (plan) than we could ever offer.

We’ve had some great players retire in recent years, but it’s time to bring in a solid rookie class. These will hopefully be trained up as solid veterans. It’s a cycle just like the NFL. Tebow’s trying to bring the Broncos back to the Elway days, and this week we’ll find someone to fill the shoes Erin Groth left!

Today, you begin. I can’t wait to see how the commissioner (God) plays this thing out!

 

Praying the commissioner brings the proper players to spring training,

Clueless agent

 

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